People Who Live in Glass Houses

glass-house-76934_1920Welcome back for the last of four sessions about the importance of commas in “Punctuation Saves Lives: Part 4”—this time we’re looking at using commas around extra information in a sentence. Here’s the conundrum I presented at the end of my last blog:

Which sentence is correct: the one without commas or the one with commas?

People who live in glass houses should get dressed in the basement.

People, who live in glass houses, should get dressed in the basement.

If you chose the first one, you’re right. If commas are placed around the information “who live in glass houses,” the sentence would be making a sweeping generality that seems ridiculous. The whole sense of the sentence changes based on whether it contains the commas. In our examples, if we include the commas, we’re saying that all people should get dressed in the basement, a statement that clearly doesn’t seem logical. That isn’t the same message that we get if we remove the commas. The information is essential to the meaning of the sentence because it limits or narrows the noun it’s talking about. Without the commas, the phrase “who live in glass houses” narrows the group of people who should get dressed in the basement: only those who live in glass houses.

When trying to determine if the information is extra or essential, it’s necessary to ask yourself, “Do I want to limit or narrow the person, place, or thing being described?” If you are, then DO NOT use commas. Commas in this setting indicate an extra or non-essential description.

Not every case of whether to use commas is as obvious as the previous one. Here’s a set of examples where the information may or may not need to be set off by commas, depending on what a writer is trying to communicate:

My brother who lives in California has never been to New York.

My brother, who lives in California, has never been to New York.

The first version communicates that the speaker/writer has more than one brother, and that a specific one (the one who lives in California) has never been to New York. The second version of the sentence implies that either the writer/speaker has only one brother, so there is no need to narrow the options or that the writer isn’t concerned about differentiating that brother from his or her other brothers. The information within the commas acts as extra material that doesn’t change the meaning of the sentence. The difference is subtle in this set of examples, and the reader wouldn’t be able to judge one version as being more correct than the other without knowing the writer’s intent. So even when the commas are neither obviously correct nor incorrect, there is a subtle shift in what’s being communicated.

The more often you know why you’re using a comma or any other punctuation mark, the more often you’re in control of your writing and your message. My hope is that you’ll be able to keep these reminders about comma usage in mind when you’re revising your own work, building your confidence as you continue to grow as a writer and communicator!

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Writing a Book Review

When you read a book, it’s really helpful for you to write a review on Amazon, and maybe even on Goodreads. That helps other readers decide whether to buy the book. If it’s a book you like, it’s especially important. When you write a review, however, there are several guidelines to keep in mind.

  1. If you know the author personally, don’t mention it.
  2. Say what the book is about.
  3. Give a few specific examples from the book itself.
  4. What did you like about it?
  5. Does the author accomplish his or her purpose?
  6. Do you recommend the book?

Here’s an example of a book review:

On Parr (2)I just finished Ken Murray’s “On Parr” about a U.S. Air Force fighter pilot. The story about Colonel Ralph Parr is fascinating, but so is Murray, the author. I found him to be part research historian, part flight instructor, and part master story-teller. The combination enables Murray’s skill as a writer to hold you in your seat, turning page after page, wanting to find out what happens next. He gives inside information about what it was like to attend an NFL game when the stadium announcer tells the crowd that Pearl Harbor was attacked. He describes in detail what it feels like to dive straight down in a fighter jet from 43,000 feet and pull up barely in time to avoid slamming into the ground, right behind eight Russian MiGs, and taking out the enemy leader. His narrative includes figures of speech, dialogue, and technical information. It’s full of sensory detail: sights, sounds, and smells. He doesn’t shy away from the emotions the characters in the stories are dealing with during hellish battle scenes of war: fear, anger, loneliness, or depression. In the process, Murray brings the reader into the action, into the context, into the time period. I discovered nuggets of wisdom, such as how to approach relationships when starting a new job, and how to balance your personal life with your career. Murray does a really good job showing the interplay between national and international politics, and how it impacts average citizens as well as military personnel. And, while shining the spotlight on Colonel Parr, Murray manages to reveal a bit of himself. For he, too, is a decorated military aviator, an accomplished writer and editor, and an outstanding example of a human being who has so much to offer. I recommend the book.

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Hesitating in Front of the Door

Welcome back for the third installment of “Punctuation Saves Lives”! Last time, I introduced the use of a comma and a “FANBOY” between two complete sentences. This time, I’ll be discussing the use of a comma after an introductory phrase or dependent clause. Dependent clauses look very much like a complete sentence, but they have a signal word or words in front of them that change their function.

Example of a stand-alone complete sentence: The young man hesitated in front of the door.

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Example of a dependent clause that cannot work as a complete sentence: Although the young man hesitated in front of the door, . . . .

In the second example, we’re left waiting for the rest of the sentence. The only difference is the “although” in front of the complete sentence. Suddenly, that sentence can no longer stand alone; it becomes a dependent clause. A dependent clause needs to be hooked up with a complete sentence to function properly. However, it doesn’t have to come at the front of a sentence—it can also be placed at the end of a sentence. When a dependent clause precedes a complete sentence, a comma is used to separate the two. Let me rearrange that sentence. A comma is used to separate the two clauses when a dependent clause precedes an independent clause. Did you catch what I did there? I used a dependent clause followed by a comma and a complete sentence. Then I started with the complete sentence and added the dependent clause at the end, without a comma separating them.

Let’s look at the two examples above about the young man at the door. When you read the first example (the stand-alone sentence) the pitch of your voice should go down. Dropping our pitch at the end of a sentence is one way we indicate to our listener that the sentence is finished. If you read the second example (the dependent clause) out loud, the pitch of your voice should stay even at the end of the clause. So, if you’re having problems identifying whether a clause is dependent or not, try reading it aloud and listen for the pitch of your voice at the end of the clause. If it stays even throughout, it’s probably a dependent clause and needs to be followed by a comma and a complete sentence. If your pitch goes down, it’s probably already a complete sentence and can stand alone.

An introductory phrase works the same way as an introductory dependent clause. They both precede the main part of the sentence, and they both enhance the meaning of the complete sentence that follows, so the introductory phrase should be followed by a comma before adding the rest of the sentence. The difference between the two is that an introductory phrase doesn’t have a subject and a verb that can be seen in a dependent clause.

Examples of introductory phrases:

Entering the turn lane, I waited for the light to turn green before I proceeded.

In the early morning, the dew sits lightly on the grass.

We’ve got just one more installment of “Punctuation Save Lives,” about using commas around extra/nonrestrictive material. Here are two sentences we’ll be discussing next time. Which of these sentences is correct?

People who live in glass houses should get dressed in the basement.

OR

People, who live in glass houses, should get dressed in the basement.

Join me next time to find out if you chose the correct answer!

Reduced Price

In order to make our services even more accessible to writers, we just reduced the price of our book formatting for authors who want to self-publish their books.

It’s already true that nobody out there can match the personalized, relationship-based approach we take with our authors. One of our clients tried calling his previous formatter, and was actually told, “Don’t call on the phone. We don’t talk to our customers.” Another low-cost formatting service says on their website, “No agency contact allowed.”

We’re not like that. Along with our lowered prices, we still invite our customers to call or email whenever they need to talk or get some information.

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FANBOYS

Here we go with Part 2 of the series “Punctuation Saves Lives.” In this article, we’re exploring the second of four common uses of the comma–between two complete sentences (independent clauses) with a coordinating conjunction. I know, you understand what a complete sentence is, but you may not be so sure of how to explain an independent clause, and you’re definitely fuzzy about what a coordinating conjunction is.

A coordinating conjunction joins (the “conjunction” part of the term) two independent clauses that are of equal value in importance (the “coordinating” part of the term) into one sentence. The list of coordinating conjunctions is relatively short—there are only seven (7)—, and this simple acronym will help you remember them:

FANBOYS—[F]or, [A]nd, [N]or,[B]ut, [O]r, [Y]et, [S]o.

Picture a young teenage male who is obsessed with the latest pop singer!

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Keep in mind, when we combine two independent clauses into one sentence with a coordinating conjunction, the coordinating conjunction MUST be preceded by a comma.

Example: I like to eat at a restaurant whenever possible, but I can’t afford it very often.

Example: The life of a teacher is full of satisfaction, yet it can be an exhausting life.

Notice that the two previous examples use coordinating conjunctions that express contrast between the two parts of the new sentence. Other coordinating conjunctions indicate addition (and), limitation (or), negation (nor), and consequence (for/so).

Example: I always use a bookmark to find my place in a book, and I never turn down the corner of the page.

Example: Pick up your toys immediately, or you won’t be going outside to play.

Example: Gerald usually doesn’t eat garden peas with his fish, nor does he eat mushy peas.

Example: I’m going to march with the protesters, for I believe in their cause.

Example: The trip to the lake is a 12-hour drive, so we’ll need to allow two days for the trip.

What’s important is that you recognize how words are working in a sentence, even when you can’t identify their jobs with appropriate labels. And it’s just as important to recognize the way punctuation helps your writing sparkle with clarity.

I hope you’ll join me next time for another common use of a comma—after an introductory phrase or dependent clause. Punctuation might not seem very important to you right now, but getting it right can make a powerful difference in your writing.

Capture the Imagination

man-851319_1920Good writing captures the imagination of the reader, grabs and holds his attention, compels her to keep reading. It creates interest and makes her care about the story, the people, the problem, or theme. It affects him deeply, almost spiritually, as if the reader does not have the option of putting down the book, the article, or the essay. She must keep reading. He has to find out what happens next. She wants to know the outcome. He is hooked.

The same is true of any form of communication: television commercials, sitcoms, and movies; micro fiction, short stories, and novels; essays and narrative nonfiction; poetry and songs; speeches and sermons. When done well, it latches onto something inside the mind or the soul of the hearer, viewer, or reader.

This happened to me the first time I read Longfellow’s Evangeline. My wife had recommended it, so I picked it up at a used book store and sat down on the sofa to read on my day off. From the opening, I was hooked. The opening lines from the first page: THIS is the forest primeval. The murmuring pines and the hemlocks, Bearded with moss, and in garments green, indistinct in the twilight (Longfellow, 95).

The story line, the language, the imagery, and the human pathos captivated me. I read the entire story that day, tears in my eyes several times. Being a guy who has always preferred nonfiction, that was the first time I was genuinely moved emotionally by a piece of fiction. I didn’t know how to process my own reaction.

Business communications consultant Milo Frank says, “The attention span of the average individual is 30 seconds. Let me give you an example. Look around the room and concentrate on a lamp. You’ll find your mind goes to something else within 30 seconds. If the lamp could move or talk, or go on and off by itself, it would recapture your attention for another 30 seconds. But without motion or change, it cannot hold you” (Frank, 15).

It is for this reason that William Zinsser writes in his chapter titled “The Lead and the Ending,” The most importance sentence in any article is the first one. If it doesn’t induce the reader to proceed to the second sentence, your article is dead. And if the second sentence doesn’t induce him to continue to the third sentence, it’s equally dead. Of such a progression of sentences, each tugging the reader forward until he is hooked, a writer constructs that fateful unit, the “lead” (Zinsser, 55).

If this is true, writers who want their stuff to be read will use a variety of means to hook and maintain the reader’s attention throughout the work, not just at the beginning. Because his mind can only focus for thirty seconds, every word, every sentence, and every paragraph has to reengage the reader, reconnecting him to the story for another half-minute. There has to be motion, change, something of interest. Even in non-fiction. Otherwise, the average reader will set aside your piece and find something more fascinating.

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Punctuation Saves Lives!

Most of us have seen it on a bumper sticker, meme, or tee shirt:

“Let’s eat Grandma.”

“Let’s eat, Grandma.”

“Punctuation saves lives.”

We may need a moment to figure out the humor in the last line, but it usually gets a chuckle. There’s a huge difference in what’s being communicated (family cannibalism versus a polite invitation to share a meal) all because of a simple comma. According to a 2019 study in the journal English Today, the comma is the most often used punctuation mark in nonfiction, and comes in a close second to the period in fiction writing, so understanding how to use it meaningfully is a worthwhile goal for any writer.

Although there are many guidelines about how to use a comma, the most common reasons fall into four categories. I’ll cover one of those reasons below, explain it, and give some examples. You’ll need to come back later to read about the other three reasons to use commas. In no time, you’ll be more confident about when to use commas to strengthen your own writing.

In a List—this is the easiest guideline, and it’s one most of us understand, at least in a basic way. When you have more than two items in a series, you need to separate them with commas, adding an “and” before the last item. The problem comes when we try to figure out whether to use a comma before the “and.” This last comma is the crux of the whole “Oxford comma” debacle. Many decades ago, Oxford University Press insisted that the comma before the last “and” was the only proper way to write. However, as in all aspects of the English language, usage changes over time. More recently many writers feel that the last comma is unnecessary and a waste of their time.

Example of an Oxford comma: “Every morning for breakfast I eat scrambled eggs, toast, and bacon.”

Example without the Oxford comma”: “Every morning for breakfast I eat scrambled eggs, toast and bacon.”

Both examples are easy to understand, and they communicate the same information. However, there are times that the Oxford comma is needed to clarify the writer’s meaning.

Example without the Oxford comma causes confusion: “I would like to thank my parents, Margo and Tristan.”

Example with the Oxford comma: “I would like to thank my parents, Margo, and Tristan.”

In the first of these last two examples, the writer may be telling us that the parents’ names are Margo and Tristan, or the writer may be thanking at least four separate people—parents (which could be two or more people), someone named Margo, and someone named Tristan. In the second example we can be assured that the writer is thanking more people than just his or her parents. You may be thinking that such a small difference in meaning is really just splitting hairs, but perhaps a more humorous example can reinforce my message.

Example without the Oxford comma: The guest speaker addressed the gang members, the mayor and the police chief. Without the second comma before the “and,” we may think that the mayor and police chief have a criminal record!

I admit I’m an Oxfordian, preferring to use the comma before the “and” to avoid any possible confusion, but I’m magnanimous in conceding that a writer may decide to withhold that final comma before the “and” and still be a competent, accomplished communicator. The best advice is to follow what your publisher’s style guide dictates. If a specific style guide is to be applied, you don’t have to even consider which you prefer. If you’re self-publishing, the choice is yours, but apply your choice consistently! No sloppy punctuation, please!keyboard-311803_1280

So You Want to Sell Your Books?

In a recent post in the Nonfiction Authors Association, Stephanie Chandler discusses what it takes to actually sell your book once it is published. The truth is that some authors spend a lot of time writing the book, then assume that the hard work is over. NOT TRUE! You might want to take some time to read her article. You can find it at:

https://nonfictionauthorsassociation.com/how-many-books-can-you-expect-to-sell-the-truth-about-book-sales-and-the-keys-to-generating-income-from-publishing/

There are some steps you can take to increase your sales, however.

  1. Develop your Platform: Your platform is a combination of your friends and followers on social media, any organizations or clubs you are active in, and your mailing list. Basically, a platform is the way people know about you and find out about you and your books.
  2. Post about Your Book on Social Media: Now that you have a book in print, at least once a week, say something about it on your various online outlets.
  3. Create a Blog: When you write a blog you have an opportunity to create Tags and Categories that people can find when they search for your topics.
  4. Start Asking for Speaking Engagements. According to Stephanie Chandler, Being an author makes you an instant authority. Use your book to help you land speaking engagements, where you can sell books at the back of the room. Use it to impress potential consulting or coaching clients. Use it to show your credibility for teaching in-person or online classes. Another option: write more books. Each book you publish builds your “back list,” and those sales build on each other. Let your book be your credibility-builder, while you cultivate a loyal tribe and build a thriving business. When you do the work, book sales will follow, and so will other opportunities. But it takes time and persistence. Focus on the long-term effort involved, and how your book can make an impact on the world. This can be a fun and rewarding journey when you shift your perspective and set your expectations accordingly.
  5. Develop a Marketing Plan. You don’t have to spend thousands of dollars, but you do need to come up with a list of ways you can get the word out about you and your book. Let people know about what you do and what you write.
  6. Enter a Writing Contest: You never know what might result from doing this. If you win, people take notice of you. If you don’t win, you’ll learn and grow from the process and get better, maybe even make some friends and improve your networking.
  7. Most importantly, Don’t Give Up: Keep on writing, and continue growing as a writer. Consider joining a writers association or workshop. Read books about writing skills and the writing life. Do you remember who won the race between the Tortoise and the Hare?

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